A journey from a full-time employee to a full-time mother, P.S I’m loving it!!

There is sweat falling out of my wet hair due to the scorching heat outside my auto, I looked at my watch and its 9:40 am already. Not only the meter reading, but my heart is also accelerating with the fear of delay for the presentation, my few slides are not yet done. Last night I couldn’t sleep for the same and now the empty stomach is burping on my head. And then suddenly my phone beeped, that is my Boss’s call. Not again, I thought. And yes that’s my story till yesterday, my present is completely different! My day no more starts with a phone alarm, there is no rush for the auto and no more presentation to make. I don’t think more about what’s cooking inside my boss’s or colleague’s head, there is no more office gossip, no selection for the slim-fit trousers and shirts and no worries about getting my leaves approved. I don’t have performance matrix to fill and competency scores to prove my worth for 1, 2, and 3 bar ratings. I don’t care about why other employees get a better salary hike and not me despite of the hard work I put round the year. No more of this. So does it mean that life has become simpler? Not indeed but still I’m loving it. . it’s been months since I left my job, but I have actually turned into a full time mother and trust me that’s a competitive job too. This is not my second life but rejuvenation of my soul, motherhood has completely transformed me upside down. Things that once were immensely important for me today seems petty for me. There is a new meaning when a day doesn’t start with an alarm clock but when my baby gently wakes up and peeps her fingers into my nose, mouth and into every space she can explore. Sometimes she even try to scratch the big mole on my forehead. There is an excitement when she smiles at my good morning gesture and how she rush to me when I extend my arms towards her. Through the window of my apartment, I often watch young girls rushing for the office and recall how once I was like them, but I no more regret as even I have meaningful things to do. My day doesn’t start at 9, never ends at 6 but it’s in a continuing pace to fulfill desires, expectations and pampering of my little angel. My buttery girl who just wants me beside herself. She has turned into my boss, my colleague, she is my performance indicator and the entire love I bestow upon her is my new competency. Being a mother there are so many things to do and you remain occupied 24X7. Earlier I had other things to glorify my day but today if my baby has successfully completed her 3 meals, my achievement is done. My calendar is constantly booked with her oil massage, splendor bath, a healthy-meal preparation, a fun-filled stroller ride and series of lullabies to offer. I was never so creative, experimental and persistent before as I’m today. That doesn’t imply that I was bad at work, my ratings and awards are always there to support but when it’s parenting, there is no scope of failure. Now I have to discover new ways to draw out her smile even when my back is paining and eyes are melting with sleep. I can’t show my frustration to her as I sometimes did during my work because she is too innocent to bear that. So I have to always present my brighter side to her and that has actually turned me more subtle. Earlier I was efficient but now being a mother I’m effective. Since the day I got my first job, ‘how to excel at work’ had been always on my mind. Since I turned into a mother ‘how to excel in life’ has surfaced in my present being. There has been a shortage of time always but there is no excuse that I can make today. My baby’s senses, my reflection day in and night I have to assure, she always feels right! A working lady may fail but a mother has to succeed always! And the most important thing above all, I had expectations from my previous life: monetary, social and physiological but with her It’s just unconditional love, so P.S. I’m loving it!!

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