The SuperMom Myth: There is no such thing!

Before I share with you any of my thoughts further, let’s put a glance at ‘supermom’ definition,

As per the Oxford dictionary, an exemplary or exceptional mother, especially one who successfully manages a home and brings up children while also has a full-time job.

As per Merriam Webster:  an exemplary mother; also:  a woman who performs the traditional duties of housekeeping and child-rearing while also having a full-time job

Oh Gosh! I’m not a supermom then:( well don’t pity me because I know you are not the one who cooks food for the family after a tiring day at work so neither you are the lucky one! Only are the few ones who can claim the title after a stupendous balance at work and home. I wonder why I’m even talking about this phrase; well the thing that is nibbling my mind is something else.

 

  • It’s about building pressure in a woman to excel in every field she steps in.
  • It’s about evaluating her failure or success by two parameters: work and home.
  • It’s about creating inferiority complex within the women breed where rather we should be celebrating the diversity, but we shift our focuses to divide who’s better than whom?
  • It’s about a never ending race, a fear of lose if a woman stops the pace at which she is managing her work and family.
  • It’s about a woman’s identity that countable only w.r.t to tangible outcomes. High designation, increased profits, better salary, high grades of children in school, unmatched performance in sports, excellence in technology but what about perseverance, love, affection, sacrifices and care?
  • It’s about creating guilt, why I can’t have it all!

 

I really get irritated over the media how they portray a famous actress or model turned new-mother as ‘mom-goals’. Why, just because she is able to hit gym or party within a month of her child’s birth? Please grow-up!!

This mind-boggling is not to debate why someone hasn’t labeled my mom ( a pure housewife)  as a supermom who successfully has grown up three of us, without any support, or technology or maid or without an equal contribution by our father who most of the time remained busy in his work. It’s about why we are creating additional lines and margins amidst this beautiful ally of “Moms”?

 

There is a difference between an exemplary woman and an exemplary mother and we need to understand this very basic fact. I was reading somewhere the courageous story about a poor milkmaid of the 16th century, named Hirakani who dared to climb a huge steep cliff from the walls of Raigad fort so as to reach her small child at home. In appreciation of her courage and bravery, Shivaji Maharaj built the Hirkani Bastion over this cliff. Now this is something to feel proud about, a quintessential about mother’s love. But in today’s world do I really need to climb the mountain or achieve an hour-glass figure to be a supermom: No, I think its rubbish!

 

First study hard, and then marry a good guy. Have children on time and then automatically switch back to your career. Don’t forget to hit the gym and yes remain creative with toddler’s recipes. Give time to your husband, play with children in the park and be nice with everyone around you. Do have time for yourself when the whole world is asleep, finish your office work and blog then and get up early in the morning thereafter. Your house, husband, children and work should be your priorities and learn to excel in all the parameters. So remember; aim to be content, happy, creative, passionate, compassionate and grateful. Are we women a machine?? Do you really want to be a supermom?

By this way, I’m honestly very far-far away from being a supermom. But this was never my aim! From the day I became the mother of my beautiful child, I aspire to my own-self. I feel like to shed away any false veil and expose what I’m truly to my child. In this way, she will connect more to me. As a mother I have also realized that I have certain limitations and a constant battle with them will not land me anywhere. I have realized that “I can’t have it all” but I still snuggle to make things better every day. I try to ‘accept’ and ‘learn’ from my mistakes to be a ‘better version’ of myself. I want to sum up my blog with the beautiful lines that I read somewhere (couldn’t imagine any better words than below):

 

It’s all a trap, because being perceived as a Supermom will not make you happy as a woman and will not make you successful as a mom. In fact, here’s the honest truth:

Your child does NOT want a Supermom.

 

Source: http://www.thepositivemom.com/supermom

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